A Snippet of The Unicornologist, Chapter 1

Standard
A Snippet of The Unicornologist, Chapter 1

 

I’m participating in Weekend Writing Warriors, sharing a snippet from the opening of my YA mystical fantasy-in-progress, The Unicornologist:

“You’ve got to give Kate a chance.”

Hillary crossed her arms. “I wish you never married her. We were just fine, the two of us alone. I don’t need a new mother.”

“She’s not trying to take Mom’s place. No one expects Kate to replace Mom in your heart, Hillary. But I love her and she’s my wife. I expect you to treat her with courtesy.”

Hillary blew a raspberry in disgust.

I know it’s short (the limit is ten sentences), but what do you think of this small excerpt from Chapter 1? Any suggestions on how I can make it better? Please leave your comments below.

I’ve previously shared an introduction to the story, descriptions of Hillary and Robin, and an excerpt from Chapter 2.

9 responses »

  1. I hope (and think, tentatively, though I’d have to read more than 10 sentences to be sure) that the girl’s relationship with her dad is playful and she’s not being flagrantly disrespectful.

    Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s