It’s time for Weekend Writing Warriors! Every Sunday, a bunch of writers post 8-10-sentence snippets from their WIPs on their blogs. There’s a lot of reading, commenting and great writing. Click on the link to see the full list.
In last week’s snippet, I shared what led up to Hillary’s running off into the woods. Here’s what she found after she wandered deeper into the forest than ever before:
From where she stood, Hillary clearly saw the horn that crowned the unicorn’s head. His pure white body shimmered in the bright sunlight, his mane fluttering in the breeze. He raised his bearded face and turned it from side to side as if surveying his kingdom, or searching for something. His tail, tufted at the end like a lion’s, undulated to alternating sides. He strode forward a few steps, then stopped, looking straight at Hillary and nodding as if he recognized and approved of her.
Hillary took a few tentative steps forward. From deep within her being came a plea that she could not utter. Come, my king…
No sooner had she thought the words than the unicorn trotted toward her, his powerful legs eagerly reducing the distance that separated them. Instinctively, she sensed this was a moment she secretly had been waiting for all her life.
I know it’s short (the limit is ten sentences), but what do you think of this small excerpt from Chapter 7? Any suggestions on how I can make it better? Please leave your comments below.