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Hillary’s dad, packing for his honeymoon with his new wife, just asked Hillary if she knows where the flashlight is. (She’s stashed it in the woods, where she plans to camp while her parents are away, because she ‘s entrusted with protecting a unicorn against hunters. Of course, her dad knows nothing about this.)
“Isn’t it in the tool drawer in the kitchen?”
“No, can you find it for me?”
Hillary knew exactly where it was—safely tied up in her pillowcase in the maple tree by the clearing in the woods. “Do you really need a flashlight for your trip?”
“I’d like to have it in the car, just in case.”
“I’ll see if I can find it.” She went downstairs and fumbled loudly in the tool drawer for show. “I’ll go look in the garage,” she called. The screen door slammed behind her. She had no intention of confessing that she’d taken the flashlight, because then she’d have to explain why.
I know it’s short (the limit is ten sentences), but what do you think of this small excerpt from Chapter 17? Any suggestions on how I can make it better? Please comment below.